I kinda feel bad that ya’ll come to a site called “MINISTRY So Fabulous” and haven’t heard that much about Starlite lately. It’s just that there hasn’t been that much to tell you over the last couple of weeks. I’m afraid that summer is a bit mundane in our office. Even Snuggles and Cuddles get bored in their playpen by 10 a.m. and resort to taking their 14th nap of the day.

I honestly don’t work a lot in the office during the summer as my summer Starlite responsibilities are more travel-based (i.e. I’m on the fund raising circuit). I also do a LOT of writing for Starlite during the summer months and I much prefer to take my laptop to Starbucks and pretend that I don’t really have Sunny Delight in my coffee mug.

But when I am in the office, I sit at a desk and write emails. And then I pay some bills and wonder why our electricity bill isn’t as high as it normally is but then I stop thinking about that because? Hello? WE LIKE IT WHEN THE BILLS ARE LOW.

Once I’m done celebrating the low electricity bill, I wander into the front area of our office and check to make sure there are no birds flying around the office (I call this part of my day “Office Security Check”). Then I head to the kitchen where I fix myself a delightful glass of Kool-Aid, courtesy of the leftover mix from this past semester’s programs. I then go back to my office and stare at my inbox while sipping my Kool-Aid and wondering when I became an adult that has an office and, really, am I an adult? Because, in case you forgot, I am drinking Kool-Aid at my adult-like desk.

Once I’ve answered 48,954,892 emails, I take another little field trip to the mailbox at the road. It takes 18 steps to get there from our front door; I know this because I sing a song with words for every step:

“Here’s the mail, it never fails, it makes me want to wag my tail ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE’S DONATIONS!”

I grab the mail and start flipping through, looking for anything that could contain money to buy more processed nacho cheese. Most days, unless it is the first couple days of the month, there’s no donations — but that’s okay. I’m still young enough to believe that tomorrow, when I go back out there singing my song, there will be a check waiting for us or maybe even a letter saying “CONGRATULATIONS, YOU HAVE WON A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF PROCESSED NACHO CHEESE!”

You think I’m joking, but I often think about what it would be like if some guy showed up at our door to tell me we had won a year’s worth of processed nacho cheese. I’ve thought long and hard about what my reply would be and, right now, I’m going with “Make that a lifetime supply and I’ll marry you and have your babies.”

I know what you’re thinking. You’re all “Well, what if it was a girl at your door?” In that case, I’d reply “Make that a lifetime supply and I’ll give you my Imaginary Boyfriend and you can marry him and have his babies.”

ONE STEP AHEAD, interlings. I am always one step ahead.