It could have been worse. Maybe.
The good news: it is possible to type using only your index fingers.
The bad news: it takes about an hour to write one sentence.
And yet, because I miss you terribly, here I am just typing away with my pointer fingers. Why, you ask?
Oh, I’d love to tell you.
It all started on Friday morning when I sat down at a desk to answer some emails. I was at an unfamiliar desk and when I reached underneath me to pull the wooden chair closer to the desk, I got my finger caught in between two pieces of wood. I jumped up, and when I did, the chair came back down on my finger which, interestingly, caused me to faint. Everything went downhill from there.
I had made plans to take MacKenzie (if you’re new to the blog, read this first to understand why I occasionally have her with me) for a couple of days and really didn’t want to break that promise if at all possible. So, I picked her up and we headed for Chattanooga to have a girl’s day out.
The next morning, I woke her up early so that we could go to the first service at church and then go swimming before I needed to take her back to her dad. After getting her ready, I went to take a shower. As I pulled the door closed behind me, the doorknob fell off in my hand.
Now, I know what you’re thinking — “Well, put it back on, AB!” Listen, I tried. For half an hour. That door wasn’t opening — I was locked in my bathroom with a six year old roaming the house. And so, I did the only thing I new to do: I had MacKenzie hold my cell phone up to the doorknob hole while I dialed 911 using one finger slid through the hole.
Similar to how I am typing this very post. Impressed much?
An officer arrived within a few minutes and started working on the lock. After struggling with it, he ended up calling for back-up. You will not believe this, but it took five officers a total of 55 minutes to get me out of that bathroom. At one point, they were seriously considering calling the fire department to bring a ladder so I could crawl out my 2nd floor window.
I vetoed that idea, seeing as I was wearing a towel. Oh, did I forget to mention that part of the story?
When they finally got the door open, I said thank you as fast as possible as they headed out of my house at an equal speed. I thought about inviting them to stay for tea but I really wasn’t dressed for the occasion.
If only the fun stopped there, my friends. If only.
Later that night, after a full day with MacKenzie, I made the hour and a half drive to take her back to her dad. I was exhausted, so I decided to stay the night at my mom’s house (which is in the same town). She’s on vacation right now, so I knew I’d have the house to myself.
I came in, pulled out my laptop and headed for the couch. On my way there, however, I somehow dropped my laptop ON MY FOOT. It actually hit my foot at an angle (the pointy corner of my laptop hitting first) and then bounced in the air only to come back again. It hurt so bad that I literally saw stars.
And then I saw something else when I began heaving and realized that I was about to revisit my dinner.
Oh yes.
So, in other words, my holiday weekend was SPECTACULAR.
It’s like a movie, my firend!!! I was hoping you’d tell me you met a super hot and goldy police officer
Can’t wait to hear the rest of the story…
Was Imaginary Boyfriend working at the PD that day and you were hoping to get a lunch date?
Oh my word!!!! you couldn’t make that stuff up!!!! at least we all get to laugh!!!! that is just too much!!!
I found you through Rocks In My Dryer and I just have to tell you that though I am sorry about your injuries, you do make me feel better about my slammed fingers and stubbed toes!
Wow. I don’t even know what to say. : )
I TOLD you that you would have a weekend to remember!!!
Girl.
That is definitely a crazy weekend…LOL!
ab my dear you are one of a kind girl! what a fabulous weekend! love you!
chicky, I am overwhelmed by your weekend… you need a nap and a trip to CB
Just do a Sunny Delight I.V. and you’ll feel much better.
Yep. I heart you. And I heart your posts.
Seriously… is there a dark cloud residing just above your well coifed head? Sorry for your injuries, but glad that weekend is gone.for.good.
Have a great Monday!
Best.Story.Ever.
I hate to laugh over others’ low moments, but I’ve gotta tell ya…I couldn’t stop. Really.
My 7-month-old finally decided I must be laughing at him and started it too. So sorry for your luck. It made a great post, though.
Only you…only you!
Wow…girl, I feel sorry that your weekend didn’t have too many good moments in it. Hope that things go better for you!!!
I”m so sorry to hear about all of your incidents! Maybe it was my fault for revisiting that ‘one’ incident in my mind…. so sorry about that!
However, this brings to my remembrance another movie: Ever After. If you say you haven’t seen it, then you must watch it before I find out. It is my favorite movie of all time. I literally watch it over and over and over. Anywho, Danielle (Drew Berrymore) gets locked in the cellar, and Leonardo DaVinci comes and takes the door off of its hinges and says, well, one of the best lines of the movie, of course!! [This is where I leave it to the movie to reveal itself in all of its splendor]
It was good chatting today! Don’t worry about all that has to be done graduation weekend. When have you ever had a problem being in ten places at once?
Seriously, though, it will all work out beautifully! 
WOW. Please tell me you pulled out the big Feel Better guns and went for some ice cream – this sounds like too big a weekend for even the PNC-Sunny D combo!