Hot pocket wisdom.
Now, this is PURELY hypothetical, but let’s say that you’re a 24 year old single female who runs a girls’ ministry that has a kitchen in the office. And let’s say that you get hungry and decide that you’d like to fix a Hot Pocket for lunch mainly because, hello, it’s either that or leftover processed nacho cheese.
So, you pop your little pocket into the oven and return a little while later to retrieve it’s yummy goodness from the hot cooking machine. Before removing said item, you search high and low for a pot holder and find that the office elves must have snatched it in the night. You search throughout the office for anything that will allow you to remove said Hot Pocket and finally come to the conclusion that you will have to disrobe and use your very clothes as a makeshift pot holder.
As you start to take off your shirt (after closing the blinds and instructing the office volunteers to STAY AWAY FROM THE KITCHEN FOR A MINUTE, PLEASE, you suddenly remember that you have a lot of unused Swiffer WetJet pads under the sink. And so, you use them in place of your clothes because, baby, walking around your ministry office without a shirt on, well, THAT’S HOW RUMORS GET STARTED.
Also: when eating said fake pizza goodness, it is best not to let any of it fall down your shirt.
Because the pocket, it is hot. And there are some places you just don’t put hot pockets. Ever.
Posted: November 13th, 2008 under Uncategorized.
Comments: 15
Comments
Comment from amykay
Time: November 13, 2008, 5:51 pm
ouch. i have always wondered how exactly that magical silver sleeve makes the insides of hot pockets go from frozen to molten lava in so short of a time period. hypothetically, good luck with those burns! 
also i just sent you an email (at yahoo) including, but not limited to, christmas things. and i tend to believe that they HAVE invented IV caffeine, they just haven’t released it to the public yet because it would be dangerous for most people. but i have a feeling if you’re really nice to the nurses……. they’ll break it out for you!
Comment from Ronnica
Time: November 13, 2008, 5:56 pm
Ouch. I’ve never used a pot holder for a hot pocket before. But then again, I have burns on my fingers to prove it.
Comment from Brandy T.
Time: November 13, 2008, 6:09 pm
When I was about 8 months pregnant, I decided to fry some pickles… while my shirt was in the dryer.
Extended bare belly + popping hot grease = grease burns on baby belly.
Not cool. Not cool at all.
Comment from Brandy T.
Time: November 13, 2008, 6:09 pm
… hypothetically speaking.
Comment from Bethany
Time: November 13, 2008, 6:39 pm
OwowowOUCH!!
Comment from Kelli
Time: November 13, 2008, 7:12 pm
I was really hoping that this was going to involve a microwave and said subject catching on fire so I could share a story. But it will have to wait for another day!
Comment from Judy S.
Time: November 13, 2008, 7:14 pm
I once dropped a hot curling iron and it brushed across my bare stomach leaving quite the burn. I once had a doctor ask me if I had my gall bladder removed when he saw the scar. ::Sigh::
Comment from TCKK
Time: November 13, 2008, 7:58 pm
Note to self. Be careful with hot pockets!!
Comment from Beth
Time: November 13, 2008, 10:37 pm
lol
Comment from Amber
Time: November 14, 2008, 12:00 am
Girl, your blog is the highlight of my day. You keep me laughing. I’m hosting a little giveaway over at my blog if you want to drop by. God bless! http://www.makerminute.blogspot.com
Comment from Michelle
Time: November 14, 2008, 12:29 am
Haha, you are becoming more domesticated by the day Amy Beth! Good thinking!
I dropped my dinner down my top last night too….it was very ouch. Although to be honest it is an almost daily occurrence for me!
Comment from Ashley Flores
Time: November 14, 2008, 1:24 pm
AB, you have to search YouTube for Jim Gaffagin and his Hot Pocket sketch. Freakin hilarious! Miss you!
Comment from Lauren
Time: November 15, 2008, 10:00 am
Ouch! When I was about 6 years old, I dropped a really hot iron right on my neck (it fell off the ironing-board) and it stayed there for at least 5 seconds.
But yeah, hot pockets can be dangerous.
Comment from Andie
Time: November 17, 2008, 12:10 am
I once was cooking shell pasta (you know, the kind that FILLS with water when cooking…um, BOILING water) and wanted to see if they were ready…pulled one out of the boiling water with the nice wooden spoon. Blew on it a bit to cool it off, but apparently I blew it a BIT too hard and it rolled right off the spoon. Where did it land, you might ask. Well, it went down my shirt and landed in that ‘unmentionable’ piece of clothing women wear under their shirts. Trying to get said pasta OUT of my shirt squished all that BOILING water out of the pasta!Try explaining THAT burn to your husband! No sympathy, I promise you!
Blessings-Andie
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Comment from debbie d.
Time: November 13, 2008, 4:17 pm
First off, I am GIDDY with joy over more than one post today…
Secondly, I see clearly now that my concern from St. Louis for PNC for Starlight should now also include concern over a lack of more than one good potholder and/or a paper towel and/or a dish towel in the Starlite kitchen that could be used in its place…