Airing my dirty laundry all over the internet.
Silly me! In all my haste to tell you about the trip to the alterations place, I forgot to tell you what we actually ended up doing with the dress. It turns out that my Friendly Alterations Specialist felt confident she could split a seam on the back of the dress, add a little extra fabric and thus enable me to wear the dress without needing to bind over 1/2 of my body with Ace bandages.
When I relayed this excellent news to my grandmother over the phone, she sighed deeply and then said sage words of advice that I shall ever hold dear: “Remember that just because she does alterations doesn’t mean she’s a miracle worker, Amy Beth.”
Oh, but the dress currently hanging my closet begs to differ, grandma.
Just kidding. I don’t call any of my grandparents “grandma” or “grandpa.” I call them all by their first names. No, for real. That’s what I was raised to do. No, FOR REAL. Every last one of ‘em by their first name.
I’m extremely happy to tell you that there is a bridesmaid dress currently hanging about 6 feet from me that not only fits but actually allows me to breathe! Whilst fully expanding my lungs! AND I CAN EVEN TAKE STEPS WITHOUT INSTINCTIVELY LISTENING FOR THE SOUND OF FABRIC RIPPING!!!
It’s the small things in life, really.
In other news, I feel the need to tell you that I was a Sandi Patty fan from the age of ten on up. I had one of her tapes (wait, does that make me old?) that I used to play over and over again as I pretended to be a bride on her wedding day. And no, I’m not kidding. That’s what I used to pretend: walking down the aisle at my wedding. Over and over again. From age ten until twenty fou………. you know, just for awhile.
Okay, in the interest of full disclosure, I will admit that, on occasion, I still walk around my bedroom pretending like it’s my wedding aisle. And sometimes I tie my bed sheet around me like a wedding dress and admire it’s long train as I walk from my bathroom to my bed, which is a grand total of about 18 steps.
But don’t act like y’all don’t still do that too. Right? Wait, right?
In other, other news, I considered grounding myself from blogging today simply because, if I were a teenager living at home, I would totally be grounded over the current state of my bedroom (and my living room, and my kitchen, and…). Grounding myself from one of my favorite activities seemed like a very grown-up thing to do, but in the end I realized I’m not that self-disciplined.
I did call Christan, one of my married best friends, last night and admitted that my bedroom could be declared a disaster area. I told her that I was laying in bed the night before, looking around my bedroom, when I caught sight of some clothes hanging off the side of my jewelry case and realized that if being single means you can just toss your shirt wherever you want at night, BRING ON THE SINGLE LIFE!
She, of course, solemnly replied “That’s not good. That’s not good at all. You need to work on this.” But I was all “Um, my blog readers said that I’ll get better at it once I’m married!” and she was all “I hope so.” and then I wanted to go stand on the edge of a mountain somewhere and yell “I LOVE BEING SINGLE!!!” whilst tossing articles of clothing whichever way I choose!!!
So, let me give you a little re-cap: in one single post I’ve admitted that I still play Sandi Patty songs whilst walking around my bedroom pretending like I’m walking down my wedding aisle whilst wearing my bed sheet tied around me AND that I had the urge to yell “I LOVE BEING SINGLE!!!” yesterday. It’s like you never know what you’re going to get with me when I wake up in the morning: do I want to be with someone today? Or do I want to be single? Should I whip out my Sandi Patty cassette tape collection or just start throwing laundry across the bedroom?!? OH THE DECISIONS I FACE UPON WAKING UP EACH MORNING.
All I know is that I sure hope I wake up in the right mindset on my wedding day.
And that it’s a good thing I’m not getting married today.
Posted: May 29th, 2009 under Uncategorized.
Comments: 10
Comments
Comment from Ronnica
Time: May 29, 2009, 10:52 am
Oh, and I’m so glad that you found a dress solution that works for you!
Comment from Rachelle
Time: May 29, 2009, 12:07 pm
girl- it does NOT get better when you get married -speaking from experience here. my bedroom used to look like a hurricane went through it when i was single- now i’m happily married and our bedroom looks like my closet and dresser drawers threw up all their contents all over the floor, our bed, ect…. but i am lots more motivated to keep the rest of the house clean. i hope my children don’t inherit the messy room gene. 
Comment from Amanda
Time: May 29, 2009, 1:18 pm
I’m echoing Rachelle here. I thought once I got married that I’d turn into June Cleaver and be able to cook, keep everything clean and organized, and look glamorous all the time by the powers of the diamond ring on my hand. Uh, no. Not only was I just as messy and unorganized as before, but now I had another person’s mess to add to mine. It wasn’t till I had a third person’s mess to add to the mix that I finally got better at (desperate enough to) keeping things orderly. And it is still a constant struggle…especially now with 4 peoples’ messes. My heavenly mansion is going to be CLEAN though, y’all!
Comment from SB
Time: May 29, 2009, 3:24 pm
Confession: when I was in 6th grade in the youth choir, they let me pick whatever song I wanted to sing as a solo. I picked Love in Any Language, possibly the cheesiest S. Pat song ever.
I loved this brief article: http://prayersforblowouts.com/2009/05/14/ben-utechts-debut-cd/. The image of a former NFL player and Sandi in the studio together had me cracking up for like 15 minutes straight.
Comment from Becca
Time: May 29, 2009, 4:00 pm
haha this post cracked me up – i love it! ps – my cleanliness got worse not better once I got married!
Comment from Kelly @ Love Well
Time: May 29, 2009, 11:15 pm
I had a Sandi Patty tape! REALLY! I did!
Of course, my parents almost outlawed it, because she was awfully close to the Christian rock line, and we all know Christian + rock is the same as God + devil.
Of the Amy Grant tape I had hidden under my bed, we shall not speak.
(They are better now, by the way. Just a few short years after the Amy Grant ban, they were encouraging my youngest brother to listen to DC Talk. The trials of being the oldest pastor’s kid….)
Anyway. I’m going to echo some of the other wise ladies here and say, marriage doesn’t magically transform you into a domestic goddess. But it does give you more reason to care. As for me and my house, it was probably seven years before I started to exhibit any domestic inclinations. (Ask my husband how often we ate pancakes for dinner.) But once it took, it took. Miracles happen.
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Time: May 30, 2009, 9:24 am
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Comment from Kelli
Time: May 30, 2009, 11:38 pm
Umm – I am afraid I have to keep with the echo… I DESPERATELY try to be super clean and organized, but unfortunately my DESIRE is not as strong as my DECISIONS! Oh well, at least I keep trying!
And I am so excited about the dress….
And I still sometimes miss walking around pretending to be a bride, so now I dream about what my daughter is going to look like as a bride. And surprisingly it is even more fun (emotional but fun)!!
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Time: June 12, 2009, 3:01 am
[...] Ministry So Fabulous Airing my dirty laundry all over the internet Posted by root 9 days ago (http://ministrysofabulous.com) And then i wanted to go stand on the edge of a mountain should i whip out my sandi patty cassette tape collection or just start throwing laundry across the bedroom to stay up late to read and then watch a tv episode in bed 2009 powered by wordpress log in Discuss | Bury | News | Ministry So Fabulous Airing my dirty laundry all over the internet [...]
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Comment from Ronnica
Time: May 29, 2009, 10:51 am
I was seriously reveling in my singleness last night when I decided to stay up late to read and then watch a TV episode in bed. I would have literally rolled around in my joy, but my single bed can’t handle rolling, especially not with a laptop on it!