I’m supposed to be writing a two-page minimum (which means we all know actually means a three to five page) paper for Advanced Grammar due by midnight but, so far, I’m only seven words into it unless you count my name and the header at the top because, if you do, that totally brings the total to 18 words at 9:51 p.m. which means one thing: I have two hours and nine minutes to continue procrastinating.

In all honesty, I’m just avoiding the paper because I’m experiencing a little bit of disappointment in the fact that I just took my first quiz (online) for Methods of Bible Study and only made an 84 which is basically like being forced to participate in Bible Bowl Quiz and letting your entire youth group down when you can’t differentiate between inductive and deductive Bible study methods.

Also, I need to tell you that the 25-question quiz included questions about what certain Greek words mean in English.  Let me put this plainly: I don’t even like to eat Greek food, so what would make anyone think I am capable of learning definitions of Greek words?  Please.

Procrastinating on papers isn’t really new to me; I write best under pressure and everyone knows the best pressure is having to submit a paper by midnight and not beginning it until the nightly news comes on.  I took this one class in college where we regularly had 20-page papers due; Cara and I would meet up at her house to write our papers and not begin on them until around 8 p.m.  Of course, we obviously had to take frequent breaks to bake brownies, watch television and talk about whichever boy we were currently obsessed with that week.  We would write until about 1 a.m. at which point I would declare that I didn’t care what grade I got before going upstairs and helping myself to Cara’s bed.  She’d stay up all night writing, wake me up at 5:30 a.m. so I could write a few more pages and then we’d drag ourselves into the classroom, papers in hand, by 7:45 a.m.  We’d somehow stay awake for the next hour and fifteen minutes; every once in awhile, we’d skip our next class in favor of breakfast at Cracker Barrel.

When I was in college, I had the responsibilities of Starlite so I never really felt like a college student.  But when we’d skip that class and eat pancakes while wearing no make-up and our favorite hoodies?  I was normal for at least an hour and I just about didn’t know what to do with myself.

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Oh my goodness, this paper.  I have got to write it even though I’d rather keep talking to you.